Finding Hope Outdoors

So ....I couldn't stop blogging :)

Today was a day to be outdoors on the trails and not inside the church. I love to experience the practices of many faiths and find they all have good and similar guidelines for living a life of compassion. As much as the church music uplifts my spirit and energizes me I must say in these past few years I have found that hiking in the forests has the same effect. I can’t help but look at all of nature and feel connected to God. Thirteen years ago I began a practice of meditation that brought great peace to my life and connection with Jesus. The stillness brought healing, a sense of wholeness and the practice enriched my life. I have to confess that I rarely do meditate anymore but the stillness and quietness of the forests has nearly the same effect.

Taking a few days off from work after the busy Christmas season I decided to get outside and enjoy the winter air. Today’s hike brought me to a new summit. Although the hike was short there was such breathtaking beauty to look out upon that one couldn't help but be thankful for the Creator and creation. The skies were full of clouds, the wind was crisp and cool and the ocean and small islands looked at peace. I am not sure which of nature I find more amazing...the vast stretches of ocean water or the tiny flowers on the moss along the trail, the rain dripping off a branch, or the fog laying low. Whichever it may be nature shows us that life is full of hope and promise, even on days like today when I struggle with nervous fear of what may come next in life, finding God in nature gives me hope and reminds me that all shall be well.

Looking down at such beauty how can one not be hopeful

I have been struggling lately with the idea of dreams and hopes. Having dreams or not having them...which is better? When I dream about something I have a tendency to get carried away and have it all planned out perfectly in my mind. When that doesn't come to reality I feel hurt and grieve over the loss of something that I never really had. Life can be going along so perfectly and then as my wise friend says “life can just turn on a dime” and that is so correct. One day life is full of hope and promise and the next the dreams are dashed away in an instant. Maybe a person’s dreams should only involve themselves and not include others. It would be safer to live without any dreams at all although I am not sure it is healthier.

The formation of the clouds was breathtaking

Tomorrow is a new day and hopefully it will involve a new hike in the same area but on a different trail. Where it will take me I have no idea but keeping my body busy, keeps my mind off the troubles of life and gives me time to connect with creation. When I look out across the ocean at the islands in the distant it will remind me to be thankful for all of life and that really, mostly the things I worry about are all small things, almost as tiny as the little flowers on the moss along the side of the trail.

Amazing how beautiful something so tiny can be...it is humbling

Christmas Eve

It has been a month of waiting, that is was Advent is all about, being patient and waiting. In my life it has been a very busy month but this past week I have finally found time to be reflective on my life and all that I have been blessed with. Today I spent time thinking about waiting and what I am waiting for or expecting from tomorrow. Am I waiting for Santa to arrive, am I waiting to spend time with my family, am I waiting to celebrate the birth of Jesus. As I thought about this I realized how much my life has evolved and changed over the years. I also thought about Mary waiting for her baby to arrive and how I am waiting for my first grandchild to arrive. Even though it is months away I feel excitement in the waiting for a baby boy to be born, just as Mary would have many years ago.

This afternoon, in need of some quiet reflective time, I hiked to the cross. As I hiked I thought about this past year, the losses but mainly the celebrations and my dreams and hopes for next year. As I reached the cross I stood looking out over the water. I tried to focus on the birth of my grandson and all the joy he will bring but my heart was full of grief and loss. I thought about the hopes and dreams I had had for this coming new year and knowing that they were not going to become a reality I couldn’t help but feel the sadness and hopelessness. The fear that I feel that this coming year could bring pain to the people I love even amongst the joyous occasions makes me not want to have new hopes or set goals for this year ahead. Is the disappointment worth the dreaming.

This evening I attended the Christmas Eve service at church where I listened to the story of Jesus’ birth, sang carols and prayed. I have to admit I left in much higher spirits and with a sense of hope. If one small baby boy, born in a stable could bring so much love and hope to our world then how can I not have that same love and hope for us all.

So tomorrow is Christmas, a day celebrated by people all over the world. Some folks will focus on Santa’s arrival, some will rejoice in the birth of Jesus, in our own ways we will celebrate being together with our family or friends and be thankful for all that we have.

Life is a journey and it isn’t the destination but the journey that matters, including all the bumps we run into along the way. In the end it is how we journey with love and hope for a better world in our hearts that really matters.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas tomorrow and a Happy New year. May 2014 be a good year for us all. I also want to thank D & J and Cathy for being such faithful readers of my blog these past three years. Even though I never really wrote about the things I thought I would, this has been a great place for me to share some of my thoughts and feelings and I thank you for always taking time to read and post. Today while hiking down from the cross I decided that this would be my last posting, #60, on this blog site... so when the year ends so will this. It’s been a fun but it’s time for a change.

Blessings to you all.

Linda

Autumn

Autumn...it’s my favourite season of all. The skies are clear blue, the air crisp and clean and the leaves so full of colour.

The dark red maples

Every day I try to walk along the pathways, looking up at the leaves, taking in their colour. There are so many shades of oranges, yellows and reds.

The yellows and oranges

The maples are my favourite, some large and orange others small and deep red. They fall gently floating down to land along the pathway and in the forests.

Leaves along the pathways

And every now and then, God shows me something extra special. A special leaf that makes me smile and laugh and be so thankful for all that I have been blessed with.



A special leaf smiling up at me



Autumn Colours

                              Life, laughter and one special leaf, life is so good.

 

Cowichan, Our Community

Yesterday I attended an event “Creating Cross Cultural Connections” for community building supported by many local non profit organizations. Leaders from all organizations were invited to attend this day long event to bring us together to build bridges of communications between First Nations people and ourselves. The hope of the workshop was to bring an understanding of each other and to begin to move forward to once again becoming a community of wholeness.

It began with one of the facilitators, Kathi Camilleri, a facilitator of experiential workshops regarding Canada’s Policy of Assimilation and Colonization, helping us to understand the village life of the First Nations people. She shared her story of being a Métis Cree and an Irish descendant. Through her we created a First Nations Village.  As we sat in a circle ( there were over a 100 people in attendance) blankets and skins were placed in the center. She talked about how to know when you were home, how to know your village and as she did people came forward and placed the objects in the center. The First Nations people knew their village by their music, the food that they ate, the canoes that they paddled, the patterns of beads on their clothing and the language they spoke. No one owned the land, the land was there for all. They only used what they needed.

We then created our village. Those wanting to be the children of the village came forward and sat on the blankets. Kathi shared with us how the children were loved and cared for by everyone. Each child was looked on as a gift of the Creator and each child had a special gift to bring to the village. If they were off playing they were fed by whoever’s home they were at. Those people wanting to be parents came and sat around the children followed by those wanting to be the aunts and uncles. You didn’t have to be blood related to be an aunt and uncle, everyone who cared for the children were their aunts and uncles. They were all family and they had an understanding that it took a village to raise a child.

Next came the elders, not the elderly but the folks who had knowledge, who had lived life and so therefore had knowledge on one aspect or another. At this time I moved forward and sat with the elders. I have never felt such a feeling of being wise and knowledgeable in my life. The remaining people then stood around the outside of the circle representing the braves and hunters. These young men would hunt and bring food to the village sharing with everyone. They did not just keep the food for themselves but everyone was given enough food. The braves protected the village and kept wild animals out, keeping the village safe from harm.

The village life centered around love, respect, kindness and generoursity. Their love for all of creation, their respect for each other, and their shared kindness and generousity to all people was the foundation that kept the village whole and complete.

When the Europeans came to Canada, they were not bad people but they had been raised in another world with other practices, where the rich owned the land, their children going to private schools while the poor worked the land and their children taken out of school early to help with the work. They had been told there was free land here for the taking, and take they did. The First Nations people were forced to change their way of life, moved off the land they had lived on and given sacks of flour to sustain them. Then the most horrid of things happened. They were stripped of their sacred items, banished from hosting potlatches and their children were taken away from them, put into residential schools, forced to speak English and punished for speaking their own language, the only language they knew. Parents were threatened with the removal of their sacks of flour (their only source of food) if they did not turn over their children or tried to hide them. We were read a statement of Canadian law that stated that they could face up to six months in prison if they did not comply. Parents could go for weeks not knowing what had happened to their children before finding out that they had been taken away to a school. Alcohol was brought into the community as a way of coping. It dulled their pain if only for a little while.

As we re-enacted this part of history each group of people, the parents, the aunts and uncles, the elders and young braves were asked how this all made them feel. The pain shared was heartfelt. We heard from First Nations women who told how their grandchildren were still suffering from what had happened to their grandparents, their lack of being shown how to parent and how to love. We heard from an Irish descendant who shared her feeling of shame of what was done to these people by her ancestors.

Afterwards, people playing the role of the children were returned to the village as adult strangers. These children had been raised by underfunded Christian Residential schools. Most were underfed and abused. When they returned families did not know each other and their connections were broken, their languages different, unable to communicate to each other they were lost. The traditions had not been passed forward to this generation, the stories not shared, the lessons of the elders not taught. They did not know how to cope or live in this new world they were returned to. They did not know how to show their love or to parent their own children.

The room was filled with so many emotions and many tears were shed. At lunch two of the Cowichan Tribes women kindly offered their services of cleansing with “brushing down” using cedar branches. The lineup was long, but the gift of their tradition that they gave to each of us and the tears and hugs shared was very healing.

In the afternoon we broke into groups sharing our thoughts and ideas on how we can move forward from this day. How we can bring together the people of this valley to be as one, to remove the racism that is shown towards and is felt here each day by the First Nations people. We know we cannot let it end with yesterday. What we learned and experienced needs to be experienced by all people. Reading about it does not give the sense of feeling that one has when they actually participate in the experience of what happened. There is hope for monthly social events to bring people together, for groups to host this workshop for all others and for it to be brought not only to the school aged children but to their parents and their grandparents so that we can all learn and understand together.

I was raised in this valley as were my parents and my parents, parents. It was in the late 1800’s that my great grandparents and great uncles came to this valley as homesteaders and began to farm the land. I have always been so proud to be part of my family, to know my ancestors had lived here in this same place, swam in the same rivers and worked the land and been part of the community.  After yesterdays sharing of stories my pride was replaced with guilt and shame. The pain I felt for what was done to the Quw’utsun people and all First Nations people of Canada was overwhelming.




The Cowichan Valley, home of the Quw'utsun people and my Welsh ancestors



As I ran on the treadmill this morning, thinking of the actions of my ancestors, how they were here living in the valley when the children were removed and did nothing to stop it, the pain and shame feelings returned and the tears flowed and as they did the words of Jesus came to me “forgive them for they know not what they do”. These words flowed over and over again through my mind and I know Jesus was right. Our ancestors did not know what the outcome of their actions against these people would be. Like all of us we learn from our elders, not from what they tell us but more from their actions and what we see. The disrespect for our First Nations people has been passed down from generation to generation and I know for healing to take place forgiveness must be given. As Jesus said I need to forgive my ancestors for they did not understand what they were doing.  I need to speak with each of my children and ask for their forgiveness, for my racist remarks and actions and for the times when I did not show them or others the love, respect, kindness and generousity that they deserved as being gifts from our Creator. I need to forgive myself. There needs to be forgiveness so that healing can begin and we can move forward together as one people, as one community no longer judged by the colour of our skin or by our ancestor’s actions.

Huy ch q’u, thank you for taking the time to read this and for your understanding. I apologize for it’s length and it’s lack of pictures. This is my first step in moving forward from yesterday. I hope it is just a small step of many that I can make to work together with others to bring wholeness back to the Quw’utsun people and all people of our Cowichan Valley.

                                   "Forgive them for they know not what they do"

                                                                                                Luke 23:34

 

Thanksgiving Day

It’s Thanksgiving Sunday in Canada, a day for thankfulness and gratitude. Last evening I prepared a Thanksgiving meal for my youngest daughter and myself. I am not used to cooking for two people and prepared enough for six but leftovers are always great. We had spent a lovely day together, walking down by the marina while getting caught up with each other. 


Sara at the Marina

As I sat down to eat with her I couldn’t help but be thankful for being blessed with such a wonderful family and their willingness to share their home with me.

Thanksgiving Dinner #1

This morning I awakened early to make the two hour drive down island and back home. As I headed out,  the skies were dark and cold but it wasn’t long before the sun began to rise. I watched as it spread its beautiful colours over the skies...first turning the thin clouds light pink and then the skies grew brighter and brighter. I watched the sun come up over the ocean, and then through the trees and eventually it shone so bright it was hard to focus on the road. As I drove along watching it come up over the hills I couldn’t help but be thankful for all of creation and everything God has blessed us with. The trees are full of autumn colours...the oranges, reds and yellows bring a wonderful mixture of colour to brighten up the green of the evergreen trees. They look amazing. I love autumn. I think it is my favourite time of year.

Autumn colours

As I continued to drive and take in all the beauty that surrounded me I couldn’t help but feel gratitude that I was born in a country with such abundance. In a country, with not only such beauty in nature but where all people are free and have the right to their own beliefs and practices. It made me think of all the men and women of our Canadian Forces...those past and present who have either given or risked their lives to keep our country a place of peace and who have gone abroad to support other countries in their quest to live in a “just” world. I shudder to think what it would be like if there weren’t brave souls who were willing to risk their lives to make a difference in this world.

Tonight I worked at our church’s monthly Community Dinner where we fed close to 140 people. It was amazing. Many of our volunteers were unable to come and help as they were having their family Thanksgiving dinner but so many new people came and helped. It touched my heart to see our hall fill up to overflowing and people jumping up to bring out more table and chairs. Thankfully we didn’t run out of food, but if we had I know the folks who were there would have understood. Many of them came to the door to thank us for the meal. There was such gratitude shared between the people receiving the meal and those serving it. We were thankful for each other. It saddens me to know that we live in a country with so much and yet so many still go hungry. Someday I hope that we no longer need these meals...that all people will have enough food and a warm place to call home.

Thanksgiving Church Display

Thanksgiving, a day to give thanks, something we need to do every day.  Living a life of gratitude, being thankful everyday, thankful for our lives, for all that we are blessed with and even thankful for the things in life that cause us to struggle but bring us personal growth. Living a life of constant gratitude is something I would like to do instead of being negative and complaining over life when it doesn’t go exactly as I want it to.  Maybe it starts with one day of gratitude, and then two and then a week and then a month until it becomes second nature to rise each day with a smile and a feeling of gratitude for all.

Today, Thanksgiving Day, was Day 1. I pray that a year from now, my heart will constantly be full of gratitude and thankfulness for all that life brings to me.

Happy Thanksgiving J

An Amazing Day for a Farewell

I have been very privileged over these past few years to use my friends' cabin for retreat weekends....a great place to get away from life and just be with creation and God. A time to refresh, renew and re-energize. Each time I walked through the cabin door I have been instantly surrounded by a calming sense of peace. Sometimes I have gone alone and other times taken a friend to share the experience with. I have posted a few blogs on here about my time at the cabin sharing pictures to show how colourful nature is during different seasons.

 Next week the cabin will change hands and new folks will arrive to enjoy the beautiful wooded area and the ocean view so Saturday I once again took the ferry across to Gabriola to say farewell to the cabin and share the day with my friends who had so generously shared their cabin with me.

I left a sunny Nanaimo but as we crossed the water I could see a huge bank of fog surrounding the island and coming our way...Looking forward and then turning and looking back was like being in between two worlds...one warm sunny and  welcoming and one dark and gloomy looking. It made me think of the sadness that would come in saying goodbye, thankfully though, only to the cabin and not to my friends.



The fog surrounding Gabriola

Upon arrival I was fed a lovely pancake breakfast and as I sat there chatting away I surveyed my surroundings remembering all the great times I had spent there, the card games, the puzzles, the night time sharing of stories while tucked in bed, the quiet meditative times of solitude, the wonderful warm fires, the laughter and the meals shared with friends. Looking out the window at the ocean view seeing the ferries going by with the wonderful coastal mountains in the background I couldn’t help but be thankful to be there again.

The morning was spent hiking along my favourite trail, the route I would take each morning from the cabin which took me through the trees, along my favourite rock pathway that looked like it was paved and eventually down to the water. I love to take my shoes off and go and play in the waves and today it was perfect. The skies had cleared, the sun was shining and someone had made a lovely path down to the water through the rocks. Within five minutes I was out in the waves having fun and my friends soon joined me. Though certainly not planned for, having not brought my swim suit, but for reasons beyond my control, I ended up enjoying a lovely refreshing swim as well which caused much laughter, especially for one of us! (Someday I shall get even with him ;).)

My pathway through the trees.

Later while sharing lunch on the deck these huge birds began to fly over our heads swooping down in front of us and amongst the trees. It began with one bird but eventually there were 8 of them. Such wide wing spans, such graceful creatures. It was so peaceful to sit there and watch them. It felt very special to be witness to their flight and gave me a spiritual feeling of awe over creation. lt made the day even more perfect.

Bird in flight

After one more adventure to walk along the rocky beach across from Entrance Island we packed up and headed for the ferry. Before we left I walked around the cabin inside and out...taking it all in and tucking it away in my memory. I was feeling very emotional and sad but with all the good memories and laughter of the day I was able to smile and leave feeling good about life. I have had so many good days and fun times at the cabin and I know there will be more to come...not at that cabin but some other place, some other time there will be weekends of retreats and adventures shared with friends or alone that refresh and spiritually renew. In the meantime I shall be ever thankful and grateful for my kinds friends generousity and willingness to share their sacred space.



Two very special and generous friends.

Thank you my friends, for sharing your home away from home and always making me feel welcome at your special cabin in the woods.





 

Juan de Fuca Part 2

Pics along the trail

We arrived at the southend trail head around 10:30 and off we went hiking through the forest full of lovely cedar trees down towards the beach. The trail was well marked with orange markers.




Peacefulness along the trail

Our first stop was Mystic Beach that had a lovely waterfall. After a quick break and adjustment of packs back up the trail we went.




Beautiful Mystic Beach



Some of the bridges and staircases

After four hours of hiking and doing more climbing that we had thought this part would have we arrived at Bear Beach, a lovely beach with three camping sites. We spent another 30 minutes hiking the beach so that we could stay in the farthest one to be close to the trail head come morning. It was a beautiful little spot and we lucked out and were close to the cache and other facilities.
 


Hiking along Bear Beach

We met up with a young couple from the states that we had seen at the trail head and chatted. I also walked down and talked to two young men from Germany who had come from the other direction. They warned me that tomorrow was a lot of up and down and up and down and loads of mud. I felt strong and knew we could do this, although I admit I was a little concerned.




Our first campsite

Amy and our favourite rock

In the morning we found a mouse had chewed through Amy’s pack and chewed our one towel. My water bottle also had a hole in it, the water flooded the bottom of my pack and part of my shoes. It wasn’t a great start to the morning and when I tried to walk on water well things really needed to improve.

Coming down one of the many cut out log staircases

The hike from Bear Beach to Chin beach was indeed many ups and downs. We would hike up one side of the hill or mountain and then go back down the other side to cross the next creek bed.



Up on top before heading back down

 It took us 6.5 hours to hike the 12 kms and we were quite exhausted by the time we reached the beach. This was another nice beach and we arrived before 3pm so had our pick of sites and grabbed one under some lovely trees with a huge fire pit area. We had a nice fire to keep us warm while we tried to dry out our wet shoes and socks and packs in the sunshine. The weather was great although the wind was chilly. The campsite quickly filled up especially once a group of students arrived. Although we didn’t sleep much from the sound of the waves we awoke in the morning to find all of our belongings intact and after yesterdays fiasco, I sent Amy to wash the dishes so that my feet would stay dry ;)

The view from our tent

Laundry drying after a muddy muddy day

Beautiful little creek where we got our water for the next day

In the morning we headed off around 8 am knowing we had 12kms to hike to Little Kutchie Creek campground. It was marked difficult so we expected it to easier than the day before. However, it really was not. Although we didn’t have to go up and down as often there was more mud on this part and more climbing around tree roots.

One of the many suspension bridges, this one the highest and longest

It's a long way down

Once we found ourselves walking along a lovely ridge deep in the forest. It was so quiet and the ground so soft and red from all the cedar trees.



Up on the ridge with the huge cedars



Waterfall before Sombrio Beach

Heading down to Sombrio Beach

We had lunch on Sombrio beach which was very beautiful.
After walking the beach we once again got back on the trail and headed off. At one point we had to climb up this cliff by pulling ourselves up on a rope. I managed quite well, it wasn’t all that difficult but I could not stand there and watch Amy climb up. The thought of watching her fall was more than I could bare. 

Amy climbing up the cliff

After coming down the other side we found ourselves forced out onto the beach once again. This time I was quite nervous about finding the trail head as in no way did I want to have to back track and go down the cliff on the rope. My fear of heights had kicked in. Thankfully Amy was very wise and kept us going and sure enough there was the trail and we were once again on the right path with only 4 kms now to go. It was our longest day and took us over 8 hours to hike the 12 kms. We were very tired and needed some sleep.  This campsite was in the trees and very dark even though it was only late afternoon. The young couple once again showed up along with another couple going the other direction so there were six of us camped for the night. I hardly slept, but thankfully Amy did.

Camping in amongst the dark forest at Little Kutchie Creek

Our last morning on the trail was great. We were up early and on the trail before 8 am. 14 kms to go! This part of the trail was wonderful. It started off with a few patches of mud but thankfully it was mostly level. We walked along trails through the salal, across boardwalks and bridges and down and up many “staircases”. We each took one tumble that day which gave us some “war wounds” to show our friends.  We also saw a few bits of bear scat so we were ringing our bells as we hiked along. We met people on the trail this day more than any other especially as we neared Botanical Beach.

On the "easy" trail heading for home

It was high tide when we arrived so we headed straight up to the parking lot where Matt our trusting driver met us....it was such a good feeling to have completed all 47 kms, over 24 hours of hiking. I must say I felt a little emotional.


YES we did it!

It was a great four day hike. I had said I would never do it again, but maybe someday I will....or find another trail to hike and camp along. There is such a deep sense of peace out in the wilderness and in the silence, a deep connection with God. It was really amazing and I can’t put into words the sense of belonging to, and awe over all of creation. It gave me a sense of wholeness and an immense feeling of gratitude for life.

Juan de fuca hike

Part 1 – Laughs and  Appreciation

What an adventure! My oldest daughter and I just completed hiking the Juan de Fuca trail, 47 kms along a coastal forested path on Vancouver Island. It was an amazing journey that took courage, strength and tested my endurance. Each night as we tucked into our small tent we would laugh and say how tomorrow would be a better easier day and finally on our last day it actually was. Looking back now it doesn’t seem like it was all that hard but while climbing up and down into creek bed after creek bed, finding our footings up and over massive tree roots after tree roots, trying to balance on chunks of wood, boards or branches to avoid falling into the hundred pits of mud it all seemed more than I had anticipated.

The Adventurers

Laughs, oh yes there were many of those and each night we would lay there chatting that even though the hike was brutal we were still laughing and having fun. The first laugh came over my new hiking poles. Within the first few hours they came apart no less than three times. I obviously had not tightened them up enough and really had little knowledge about them or how to use them...I would be walking along and all of a sudden notice a piece was missing, but they were my life saving piece of equipment. I could never have heaved myself up over all those logs, steps and hills without them. By the second day my daughter also found them useful at times and we shared them as we went along, sometimes finding them a hindrance but mostly very helpful.

On the second morning the biggest laugh of all was when I somehow thought I must be like Jesus and able to walk on water. Camped on the beach I volunteered to go down and rinse out our dishes in the ocean. As I was walking across the seaweed it crossed my mind that I was not walking on solid ground and with each step was sinking a little more into the ocean waters. Did I stop and turn around? Of course not I just kept on going until I was ankle deep, then tried to climb up onto a slimy rock, slipping back into the water once again. Yes during this time I was wearing my hiking shoes. I cried out to my more sensible daughter...I’m all wet. Why, I ask myself was I surprised at this fact? Feeling very stupid, almost to the point of tears, but not wanting to quit the hike I spent the day hiking in one very wet shoe and one very damp shoe.


Bear Beach, the place where I attempted to walk on water.

 

Laughs also came when my daughter slipped off the stump and into the mud for the first time...I of course was already muddy up past my ankles from trying to go around the mud and slipping off the bank down into it all while hearing quiet gasps from my daughter behind me as she watched. My daughter though when slipping off the log just gracefully sat down on the log while her foot sunk into the wet soggy mass of mud below.




Navigating one of the many mud holes

I must say though that the biggest laughs came on our last day. The longest in kms but the easiest of days. While climbing up a gentle slope trying to avoid the mud my daughter slipped off a root and landed sideways laying down thankfully on mossy hard packed earth. With the heavy backpack on she laughed saying “I’m like a turtle,  I can’t get back up” and she really couldn’t. There was no where to put her feet so she laid their curled up laughing. Eventually she was able to remove her pack, unlike the poor turtles, and stand up and reload her pack. Later that day, I missed stepping up onto a boardwalk and fell down on my knees, the weight of my pack pulling me over onto my side and I too was like a turtle laying there making sure I was still all in one piece. Thankfully I was able to roll myself back over and get up once again onto my very tired and sore legs, and yes have a small laugh.

Each night was we watched others enter the campgrounds we would check out their shoes and  legs and each time we realized that we were the muddiest of hikers. We have no idea how the others managed to arrive so dry and clean. Our shoes and legs were always covered in mud, although it was usually dry by the time we camped. By the end of the hike I had decided we were just the cutest muddiest turtles on the trail and could be proud of the fact.

The laughing turtle getting back on her feet :)

I learned so much about myself on this four day journey and so much more about my daughter. This year marks the time that I am twice as old as she is. This hike was a great way to celebrate that and there were times when our roles reversed, where she was the caregiver and the encourager as I became teary and fearful. I saw her strength, realized how calm and level headed she is and very wise and mature. Although I have always been so very proud of her my pride in her has now reached a deeper level and understanding. It also gave me a greater sense of appreciation for nature and life. The creations of God while on the trail and the creations of man upon returning home. I have so much in my life to be grateful for, it is overwhelming. Thank you Amy for a wonderful holiday!

p.s. Could this be the man of my dreams...the tall silent type with a smile?

 

The Winner's Dinner

Just a quick note to update the blog about the challenge I won in May. I must say the chef totally came through with an amazing dinner and we had a wonderful evening celebrating the end of our challenge. I think he definetly made a better second place finisher than I would have. I usually like to win and I have to confess that this month I will probably be down in third or fourth place and maybe that will be good for me. I think I can get too overconfident. This month will be a humbling experience and a necessary one...thankfully there is no challenge on this month (nor will there ever be again) so I won't have to prepare a dinner!
Hats off to the chef...who I really only snuck past by a few points...he was true to his word and came through with a meal to die for.

An awesome meal prepared by an awesome guy!

 

Losing a Winning Challenge

Well the monthly “challenge” ended yesterday with quite surprising results. I won! But did I really? At the beginning of the competition I so wanted to win mainly because, well I like to win but also I have a fear of cooking for people. It’s something I have done very little of and a cooked meal was the prize...cooked of course by the 2nd place person. So for the first three weeks I constantly was on the move...hiking when time allowed and walking in the neighbourhoods more than I would have ever done without something driving me. However by the third week, knowing we were tied and my challenger was going hiking and walking while on holidays, I pretty much accepted my fate. It didn’t help matters that it rained the whole week here in town. I realized how competitive I was when I pulled a pair of what my mother used to call “puddle pants” and went out walking the neighbourhood in the rain. It really was much beyond what I needed to do (although I only won by only a few points so it was a good thing I did go out).  

So once I accepted the fact that I would be second or maybe even third I started to plan for it and thought of funny ways to honour my friend who would win. I dreamed up a few items of embarrassment for him and was all ready to begin implementing them. Rising at 1:30 am to check on his downloaded points knowing how many I had, I was so surprised to see I had sneaked by him and had won. I was also very surprised by my disappointment in winning. Now I would not be able to put into action events that I thought were funny. I also felt rather bad for winning because my friend really is more physically active than I am and in much better physical shape. He is the one who has brought out my desire to hike and be in nature, and if it wasn’t for his encouragement I would never have joined the gym two years ago and be in the physical shape I am in. He has been a role model to me in many ways. He truly deserved to win but he hadn’t because I had become over obsessed with the challenge and done way more than I will ever do again. There should have been more balance. I wonder now how my body will adjust as the physical activity lessens. It probably will not be good.

Exploring with my "teacher" and buddy

This challenge has taught me that winning isn’t everything, it’s what we learn along the way. So many lessons were learned in this month about myself, about my friend and about limits. It also taught me that sometimes there is no joy in the win, although I must confess I have bragged to every single person who knew about the challenge and I did it within hours of winning. I was surprised actually that it didn’t show up on the local news J

I would like to think that if this were to happen again I would handle it differently. I wouldn’t let it control me and I could also be a more graceful winner or happily accept 2nd place. We really were all winners. We all got more exercise than ever, we spent hours outside in nature and saw many beautiful parts of creation, we shared laughs and we learned that even when our better sides aren’t showing we can still love one another.

Would I do it again if challenged? Probably. Would my friend do it again if he was challenged? Maybe.

Would his wife, who had to endure all of our negative behaviours and conversations allow it ...I certainly hope not... she, is very wise. 

 

The soon to be chef, the wise one, and myself